This is 30: Turning 30 Year’s Old

bright-celebrate-celebration-769525

I’ve been reflecting on my age. This year I turned 30 and was expecting some sort of wow moment but it hasn’t happened yet. I remember being 20 and looking towards my 30th birthday with distain. Wouldn’t that make me middle aged? But 30 definitely isn’t as bad as I would have thought. It’s kind of like being in your 20s but with more confidence, money and grace. There’ll be some things I would miss from my 20s, but 30s has been pretty awesome so far.

I definitely miss being young and flirty. Life got serious for me early when I had my first daughter at 24 and married; but I still enjoyed being carefree, managing to grow my career and being free to move around.

I’ve enjoyed the benefits of being considered conventionally attractive and now that I’m over 30, I definitely notice I’m not as much on the radar. I don’t really need to be as noticed anymore, as a mother and a wife, but you can’t help but miss the days when your whole future was ahead of you and possibilities seemed endless. I’m not someone chasing after my youth but keeping up my appearance was so much easier in my 20s. There was more free time to look after tweezing, waxing, and shaving; beautifying was generally easier. Nowadays, I can go weeks looking like Godzilla. I’ve also cut back on the makeup time. I used to blend, sculpt and contour every day and, goddamn, I was able to look extra flawless after 20 minutes of caking it on. At 30, with 2 kids in tow, I can barely manage to throw on mascara and lipstick.

I don’t miss being broke and unestablished though. That was the worst. For the longest, I could barely maintain a balance of $500 in my bank account. It was so stressful not knowing if I was ever going to make it. I spent years going into debt. Sometimes, I would imagine what my life would be if I had a job that was stable. I always imagined I’d have more in my life; a bigger apartment in a better location. But things aren’t too bad. I’m now more established in my career and could job hop to most comparable companies.

I recognize that the next 10-15 years I’ll be the most marketable based on my experience and age. Just trying to capitalize on that and make as much money as I can, while I can. Then I’ll probably get an masters or law degree if I feel I’m aging out of being competitive. Or I can start a whole second career; to be honest, real estate is starting to feel tired.

Compared to my 20s, the relationship side of my life is pretty stable. From 20 to 23 it was fun to date. Parties and meeting people seemed so exciting like I can meet the love of my life at any time. Nothing happened because I actually met the love of my life at 18, who I married at 24; but the idea that I wasn’t settled yet and living spontaneously was amazing.

I also hadn’t mastered the concept of “all in good moderation” when it came to drinking. I was drinking garbage $5 vodkas like Smirnoff and watered down wine coolers. 30 year old me would prefer Grey Goose and Cranberry or an aged wine.

Being 30 years old, parties are fun. I mean, not in the same way they were in my 20s, but I finally learned how to relax and just enjoy the moment, and that’s pretty amazing. I also learned how to small talk. I’m not socially awkward anymore and I no longer have high expectations that I’ll either be meeting my partner for life or my new best friend. I can just enjoy people as they are and that is a gift.

On the other hand, I don’t miss being naive and unexperienced about life. I spent a lot of time in my 20s not knowing how life works. I couldn’t accept that life was unfair and I wanted to correct it so badly. Questions like: why are there homeless people, why are people so greedy and selfish, and why does that guy ignore me but like her? Now I can accept the answers as they are: the world is complicated and imperfect, not all problems can be fixed and the world doesn’t revolve around me. The world’s darkness doesn’t disturb me like it once did. I guess I’ve gotten used to imperfection.

I have a good handle on what’s happening around me and feel confident that I have enough life experience to handle confrontations/disagreements at work and in my relationships. I used to feel like I didn’t have much to offer and constantly allowed others to walk all over me. I can stand up for myself better now. I’ve also learned how to let things go when they aren’t going my way and not to dwell on the negativity that other people bring. That’s a skillset I wouldn’t trade for anything.

For me, my 20s was about being independent, learning about myself, enjoying my youth and beauty, and trying to get established. My 30s are going to be about gaining security, growing in self-confidence, gaining perseverance and taking my life to the next level. Looking forward, I finally have the resources and experience I need to do those things. There are really no excuses. The next 10 years are going to determine whether I spend my 40s in a midlife crisis or whether my 40s will be the most exciting years of my life. But overall I feel like my best years are just ahead of me.

So this is 30. I’ve made it to the 30 club.

Check out my other posts:

Things I Wish I Knew When I Was 18

How To Make A Change in Your Life

Blood Is Thicker Than Water: The Power Of Family

 

 

 

Tags: Life after 30 years old, 30 year old girl, important life lessons, over 30 years old, 20 years old, turning 30 year old woman, almost 30 years old, I am 30.

20 Shocking Sales Stats That Will Change How You Sell

Businessman talking on cell phone and writing in office

I came across this post years ago on LinkedIn. I found that it really helped me to get a sense of where I was going and how I could make better sales. This was definitely something I needed during my brokering years, when I was only making commissions as my source of income.

Those were the good old days.  Nothing makes you a better sales person than when you’re forced to sell or not eat.  It’s a hard knock life out there and honestly most jobs require that you know how to sell, at least in some capacity.  The key is to be persistent, use follow-up, be creative and use all avenues to generate income.

So whether you are a novice, or are a seasoned sales person, this is a good cheat sheet to help you keep your priorities in line.

I’m leaving the link at the bottom, but here it is summed up:

  • 92% of all customer interactions happen over the phone.
    • Yes, making phone calls is probably the best and most efficient way to get new business.  I make an effort to call all my clients.
    • If I have bad news or if I have something urgent, I’ll make sure to do it over the phone.
    • I’m not sure if this includes text messages, but I’ve found text messages to be highly efficient for an immediate response.
  • It takes an average of 8 cold call attempts to reach a prospect.
    • Follow up, follow-up, follow up.
    • I take it a step further and follow-up via text, phone and email.
    • If someone isn’t ready to buy now, I always ask, “when will you foresee that you’ll be ready.”  I don’t let people go without a timeline of when to call next.
  • The best time to cold call is between 4:00 and 5:00 pm.
    • I personally find, 5:00pm-7:00pm is also pretty productive.  People are done with work or are finishing up and are more likely available to take calls.
  • 35-50% of sales go to the vendor that responds first
    • OMG, yes! This is probably the most annoying thing about sales.  When people are shopping to buy something, it’s usually very urgent, so they call everyone who sells what they’re looking for.  Being the first person contacted and responding WILL help your closing ratio.
    • My issue is that you always have to be available to cater to clients that need immediate attention.  Don’t forget about work-life balance.
  • 80% of sales require 5 follow-up calls after the meeting 44% of sales reps give up after 1 follow up.
    • If you were able to get a meeting, you should be able to do 5 follow ups minimum.  The effort to get a meeting is hard enough, quitting after 1 followup makes the meeting wasteful.
  • Thursday is the best day to prospect, Wednesday is the second best day.

 

  • Nearly 13% of all the jobs in the U.S are full-time sales positions.
    • Pretty much all the work I’ve ever done has been sales. Perfume sales, product sales, real estate sales.  Sales isn’t for the faint of heart.
  • Over one trillion dollars are spent annually on sales forces.

 

  • In a typical firm with 100-500 employees, an average of 7 people are involved in most buying decisions

 

  • 78% of salespeople using social media outsell their peers.

 

  • Email is almost 40X better at acquiring new customers than Facebook and Twitter.
    • Email is king in terms of converting sales.
    • Don’t forget the power of an email newsletter or subscription list.  I’ve gotten some really great clients from my subscription list.
    • Just remember you need a large email list before you can see it work its magic.  I think I had 1000 emails before I started getting people reaching out from the list.
  • Salespeople who actively seek out and exploit referrals earn 4 to 5 times more than those who don’t.
    • Hell, some of my best opportunities have been from referrals.
    • Don’t underestimate the power of “word of mouth”
  • 91% of customers say they’d give referrals.  Only 11% of sales people ask for referrals.
    • Referral clients are king!  It’s a free way to grow your business, I say why not!\
  • Only 13% of customers believe a sales person can understand their needs.
    • The client always thinks they know better. It’s our job to manage expectations and explain what we are selling.
  • 55% of the people making their living in sales don’t have the right skills to be successful
    • A lot of people do it part-time!  A lot of people don’t treat it like a job or assume they have the right personality.  You have to learn the skills first!
  • Continuous training gives 50% higher net sales per employee

 

  • The average company spending $10K-$15K hiring an individual and only $2K a year in sales training

 

  • It takes 10 months or more for a new sales rep to be fully productive.
    • So don’t change companies every time you go through a downturn, it just hinders you from being productive.  You need to work through it and find out how to make your business work for you.
  • Retaining current customers is 6-7X less costly than acquiring new ones.
    • Maybe you’re current customers are needy and time-consuming.  Giving them up, would mean putting 6-7X more effort to finding new ones.  Stay the course!
  • The average company loses between 10% and $30% of its customers each year.
    • Losing customers is normal.  That’s why it’s important to keep building your customer base through different avenues.
  • After a presentation, 63% of attendees remember stories. Only 5% remember statistics.

Here’s the link to the original website I found.  The general gist is that you have to be persistent as hell when you’re in sales.  Your sole job is to sell people products or services that they need or might not even realize they need yet.

Happy Selling!

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Check out my other posts:

My Favorite Motivational

Top Lessons I learned In Business & As A

Organize Your Mind: How To Be More Productive With Your Day

How To Make A Change in Your Life

I’ve been thinking a lot about change lately. There’s a lot of change I want to bring into my life.

I know so many other people who want to make changes in their life but can’t. I know people who are afraid of change and avoid it at all costs.

But why not just embrace change? I’ve realized that change is inevitable and something we can’t always control. Sometimes I’m sitting in my room thinking about the day my parents get too old to visit me or if me and K ever get sickly and one of us have to stay home full-time. I think about our retirement and whether we’ll have enough. I think about my daughter and that in 13 years she’ll be off to college.

Some of these are good changes and some of them are bad, but the reality is that some or ALL of these changes will happen at some point.

Right now I’m not so happy with how things are going. I have enough money now but not enough TIME. I’m always clawing for more time, with my husband, my daughter, our family, and for myself. I’m working or doing chores at home. Working a 40hr week plus commuting 12-15 hours a week plus a child plus a husband is a LOT. I’m trying to move away from that and maybe use this blog as an outlet to make that happen.

I’m ready to make a CHANGE.

I could be unhappy and take it out on the people around me. Kind of play the blame game. So many people do that when they feel helpless in their situation but that’s not the type of change you really want to make in your life. See, blaming others for changes that are or aren’t happening in your life makes you lose your sense of responsibility over yourself. It puts you in the hands of someone else to fix your problems. Almost all problems can be fixed by taking ownership of your problems, making a long-term plan to fix the problem, and then following through with action.

“If you always do what you did, you’ll always get what you’ve got.”

I heard this quote somewhere and it struck a cord with me.

Sometimes you have to do something different to get the result you want.

I have a handful of friend that are still doing to same things they used to do in their early 20s but are bemoaning that they can’t find a good guy. I’m sorry, if you sleep with a guy on the 1st or 2nd date and that hasn’t really worked for you in 5 years, shouldn’t it be time to, I don’t know, change things up? Maybe you can go with a different persona than fun, carefree and sexy girl, since that’s not getting the strong, serious and responsible guy you’re looking for.

Or the friend that complains that they don’t have the career they deserve yet, and no opportunities. Meanwhile, they spent their younger years high as hell, partying and having fun.

We all reap what we sow. We shouldn’t rely on chance or luck to get us what we want in life. The life we want can only come through conscious change.

My sister S loves to live in the past. She’s all about growth and finding herself so she looks to the past to understand herself and see what could be in her future. She said her biggest issues stem from her childhood, she doesn’t feel she got the right support from our parents.

I was like, “how does that help you change your life, by knowing that?”

She replied, it helps her to make good choices now and when she acts out, she can understand where it’s coming from.

I don’t know…it didn’t seem like she could really make a change in her life with that way of thinking. Yes, she understood what was holding her back but she wasn’t able to move past it.

Looking at the past is only half the story. You also have to look to the future too to make real change in your life.

People hate thinking about the future, it gives them so many bad thoughts about failure, shortcomings, mortality. But the future is HOPE, a part of your life that has not been written. It’s a part of your life that you can still alter and make right. So to make a real change in your life you need to look at the future too.

You need to envision the future you want and then stitch together how that’s going to happen.

Example: P wants to be able to move out of her parents house, they don’t have money to assist her, and she doesn’t have enough savings yet to make the move. P does have a job, summer is around the corner and she’s about to get more hours at the restaurant she waits at. P wants to move closer to the city so she can start a new career in fashion and meet the love of her life.

Scenario 1) P spends her whole summer hanging out with friends, going to the beach and enjoying herself. She could have picked up a few more shifts but decided she’d rather just take it easy this summer and have fun. She’s been talking to her parents about helping her move but together they still don’t have enough to make it happen.

Scenario 2) P sits down and thinks it over. She thinks about what she needs to do to make what she wants to happen.  First she’ll need money.  She’ll need to go out less and maybe take on a few extra shifts at work.  She also needs to find a roommate.  Sharing housing costs will make it easier to financially afford the move..  She thinks about all her friends who would need a roommate.  So she puts up a post on FB and finds an old friend that lives in the area that she wants to live in.  There’s going to be a spare room opening up in 2 months.  The deadline is tight but this gives P a goal.  After 2 months of grinding and saving, she’s able to put 95% of what she needs away.  Her parents, seeing her work so hard to meet her goal, decide to help her make the 5% difference so she can move.

Planning ahead and putting together steps to make positive change takes discipline.  And there will always be that voice in your head that says, “What if I can’t do this?”  A small seed of doubt.  My advice is to trust your gut on what steps you’ll need in your future.  You’ll never be able to predict the outcome of your choices or the changes you’ll make, but an educated guess is better than no change or action at all.

There are people who wait in life for luck to happen to them and there are those who take a stab in the dark, make things happen, and make their own luck.  It’s through change we’re able to do that.  Which person are you?

Feel free to like, comment, share and follow if you thought this post was useful.

Check Out My Other Posts:

The Power Of Change

The Power Of Positivity

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Status Update: I’m Still Not Vibing At Work

Things have settled in my job quite a bit since I last posted about it.  I’m actually about to go on vacation which I 1000% deserve considering how hard I worked in April and May covering the whole office while people were leaving this company left and right.

And yes, I was showered with praise and gratitude during that time.  I showed what I was truly made of despite being undermined by my coworker.  But people in this company forget and now that things have settled down, all that gratitude is being eroded.

They had approved some time off for me WAYYYY before the whole transition of the previous manager leaving and the new one being hired.   Then they hired the new manager who required the same vacation time.  So now here we are in August about to leave the office in the hands of our Director and another property’s manager.

I take so many issues with the company I’m at now, with how they treat their employees. Last time I checked Paid Time Off was part of the benefits program and each employee was entitled to it.

My Director has the gall to tell me:

“You know, Our Director of Operations, really wanted you to cover those days your manager (N) had off.”  “I know we approved those days but your lucky we let you keep them.  Technically your time off is voluntary, it’s not a necessary part of running the business.”

I was like WTF is she telling me right now??? Am I slave?   This is crazy!  I can’t believe she said that to me.

I respond, “Well, this time was approved before the previous manager left.  I honestly don’t consider working 7 days straight and then having 5 days off a vacation.  Our vacations are well deserved, I especially since I worked very hard this year.”

She let it go after that.

You’re probably reading this right now like why the hell am I still at the company.  They obviously don’t respect their employees and would rather abuse them.  But it’s a good paying job, great benefits and a steady paycheck.  (shrugs).  A job is a job.

It doesn’t help that my new manager, N, doesn’t know how to navigate the whole political landscape that is part of the role.  In less than 3 months he’s got our marketing director, director and some of the other departments upset with his attitude towards their requests and the changes he wants made.  Apparently making changes that would be efficient would create work for other departments, which they HATE.

You see the corporate environment doesn’t care about your individual contribution.  Every single employee, except for ownership, is replaceable.  We are to produce more and more each year.  There’s no “rah, rah, hoorah!” for meeting last years quota in a bad market.

But you know from my previous posts that I know how to be an entrepreneur so that’s the hard part for me.  I KNOW things can be better.  I KNOW I don’t have to be treated like crap.  I KNOW I could start my own business tomorrow and in 5 years be somewhere with it.   And I am going to start a business, I’m going to start taking this writing thing and motivational shit seriously.  But right now I just need this paycheck and benefits before I get the ball rolling.

I honestly feel more uneasy about my career at this company than I every felt while working for myself.  I’m constantly reminded that things can change in an instant and the office life I got used to could be taken from me by the “powers that be.”  At least when I was self-employed I could rely mainly on myself.  I am probably the most reliable person I know.

So my Director spent the whole day talking about how she hated our new manager.  Then she went on to me and how she thought the old manager ‘walked all over me.”  She had repeated this in front of all my colleagues.  Those were her literal words.  It was rude and uncalled for, and definitely inappropriate.  I could tell she was just trying to get under my skin and find out how far SHE could push me.  I wish I could go to HR, but honestly I don’t trust HR.  The HR here does the BARE MINIMUM.

You’re only bitter because you’re a sad and lonely woman.  I feel sorry for you.  Now I wish I said that but I was like, let me keep my job today.  Please.  I need to pay off the remaining $25K of my student loans.  And I didn’t want to stoop to her level.  You know, karma and stuff.  Then she went on to brag about how she fired our weekend receptionist because she couldn’t print labels.

I think the best strategy when working with cocky, difficult and challenging bosses is just to keep it moving. We are so over worked at this company, no one even has to stand up to the bosses and make a case for themselves.  The level of manipulation here is so painful and obvious but it works.  Enough people are quiet.

I personally think a lot of work environments allow this type of toxic behavior.  Anywhere you have people vying for their own economic interests you’ll have people fighting dirty.

I also got to meet the manager of one of the other departments.  I never met someone so inauthentic.  I didn’t get good vibes. She’s covering while N and I are out of the office and she didn’t seem too thrilled with the task.

Looking at her, I realized I’ll never go up in value in this company.  They don’t value their employees and the people they bring in to manage…just can’t.  I don’t want to be part of a management team that uses threats and manipulation to keep their employees in line.  And as a result, I don’t want to be part of any management team because almost all corporate environments require a cut throat demeanor.

But there are still many people who don’t need to stoop so low or cut down their teams to  feel productive and feel important.  I’ve seen them.

Thats why I vowed to return to being an entrepreneur and help teach others how to be entrepreneurs.  Because at the end of the day no one is going to give it to you,  The only person who can get it is you.  The days of working for a company and being respected and treated with dignity are over.

Please check out my other posts:

  1. My Job is Killing Me….
  2. Never Believe The Propaganda, Create Your Own Purpose
  3. My Favorite Motivational Mantra
  4. Stand Up For Yourself, Even When You Have Everything To Lose

 

 

 

 

Top Lessons I learned In Business & As A Salesperson

The first “Job” Job I ever had

When I was 21, I started an online distribution company on Amazon.  I was working for this shady distribution company acting as their “Purchasing Manager” for like $15 dollars an hour.  They wanted me to get contacts for brands like MAC cosmetics, designer fragrances, coach bags, and other high end accounts.  My role was to buy at wholesale then ship oversees where the product was scarce and make a huge markup at the other offices.  It was super shady because we were dealing with an international Singapore office and selling goods that were unauthorized by the brands in certain locations.  Basically dealing in a gray market.  Turns out the whole beauty distribution industry is super shady in this regard.  Rather than discount certain goods to the public, companies like MAC cosmetics or Proctor & Gamble will sell to third party distributors old and unsold products, who will then sell it again to online sellers, third party shops and overseas.  So all those Ebay and Amazon stores selling cosmetics and goods are not necessarily fake, but are likely old product that’s been cycled through different distributors.

 I eventually had a contact for MAC cosmetics and decided to be bold and use it for my own use and become an Amazon pro-seller.  The money was just calling me.  I couldn’t help but think if I start selling this stuff people would buy it.  This was my first experience working for myself and being an entrepreneur.   My online store  was for cosmetics and our main item for sale was MAC Cosmetics. You wouldn’t believe how popular MAC is online, we had this wholesaler who would sell it to us. (I swear it was authentic). That was literally the only thing we would sell. I sold 80k worth of it within the first year.

Well I guess we didn’t tip the wholesaler enough because he stiffed us on the product and wouldn’t sell to us any more.

All the other product out there to buy was pretty much garbage and not giving us a high enough profit margin to make the effort.

After that I closed the business but I learned a few good lessons about owning a business:

  1. Never go into business with a friend.
    1. It sounds fun at first but it’sa recipe for disaster. I had worked with her at the distribution company and it was a lot of fun.  I felt guilty for taking the contact and profiting on my own, when my best friend was sitting right next to me.  We had very different approaches to the business though.  She wanted to cash out too early so we were never able to reinvest or grow the company. If our orders were growing, it would have been more worthwhile for the supplier and he would have been less likely to drop us like that. We were unknowingly wasting his time by making him fill our small orders twice a month.
  2. Always tip the people who help you make money
    1. It’s just good karma and it good at relationship building. You won’t believe how good “You’ll scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours” strategy works.  I was so stupid to not give a nice Christmas bonus, like it’s such an obvious thing to do. When when your young and trying to start a business with absolutely no money, every dollar counts, but the dollars you spend on the people who help you be successful are the most important to spend.
  3. Never rely on one source of income or client for your business.
    1. When the MAC supply ran dry so did our business. We never bothered to diversify. We could have done videos on makeup or promoted our own products. But we never got that far.
    2. I’ve also read about other people making this mistake like YouTubers and Insta Influencers using only one platform to make their connections.  This is obviously risky since you are not in charge of the overall platform and if they decide to shut you down because of a “policy violation,” well then you’re SOL.

Lessons I learned From Being A Salesperson

When I stopped doing what the other salespeople were doing that’s when it clicked and I started to do so much more business.  There are 10,000 licensed real estate salespeople in  NYC.  There are only so many rental and sales deals for all those agents.  The reality is that not everyone will be successful in this industry and many are living hand to mouth and deal to deal.

They say 5% of salespeople make 80% of deals. To be the top sales person you need to do things other people aren’t willing to do or are too lazy to do.

In real estate that meant doing a mailing list. Many agents were too preoccupied with finding their next deal, they didn’t think ahead to do long term prospecting like email blasts and promotions.

I also prospected by cold calling leads for exclusives and following up relentlessly. All I needed was to have one door open and then I would snowball that opportunity into other opportunities.

Over time you want to create a snowball effect of success. Promoting yourself and showing off your accomplishments helps you get the confidence and business you need from new customers.  The snowball effect is probably the most important lesson I learned.  The more time you spend on a business, the more it should grow.  It should never be stagnant  unless there is a catastrophic economic collapse or recession.  The issue is that no one teaches you how to start the snowball.  In the beginning, it looks very small and almost useless to keep rolling.  Maybe a piece breaks off here and again there but over time all the cumulative effort you made over the years will be worth something, it will get stronger, and next thing you know you have a giant business! (Snowball!)

Once the snowball is huge, that’s when people notice you and give you more business with little prospecting.

Things that will help you grow your snowball:

  • Mailing lists and email blasts with all the contacts you’ve ever had
  • Cold calls
  • Holiday cards
  • Quality business cards
  • Neat  work space
  • Requesting referrals
  • Gifts at closing
  • Following up with service, doing surveys
  • Having a business plan and marketing plan
  • Being consistent with the above items

I hope you’ve found this post really useful. It was actually a discussion that I first started on Quora but it was so popular there, I decided to expand on the discussion.

Let me know your thoughts and feedback and feel free to follow, share and like.

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